So, this is something that I wanted to try yesterday but couldn’t because of unforeseen circumstances. Here’s the gist of it: this is a new segment where we recognize the best and the worst of the week. Think of it like TV personality Keith Olbermann’s World’s Worst segment, but for video games and focusing on one great moment and one failure instead of three failures.

And just like Olbermann, the mileage of seriousness will vary depending on the week and selection.

So, we begin with the inaugural Last Week’s King and Kong here at


Before we begin, I would like to extend my sincerest condolences to the family, friends and co-workers of Satoru Iwata. While some may take issue with some things of late, you can’t deny that he played an integral part in bringing Nintendo back into major relevance in the last console generation. While he won’t be crowned King for this week, his career — which included time as a programmer at HAL Laboratory, working on games for the Mother, Pokemon, and Kirby franchises — makes him an honorary Ultimate King.

Ultimate King Satoru Iwata
“On my business card, I am a corporate president. In my mind, I am a game developer. But in my heart, I am a gamer.” – Satoru Iwata, GDC 2005

As for this week’s King, it goes to the gaming tag team known as ProJirard the Finishist. In case you are unaware of this joke, it all started when Dan Avidan of Game Grumps mistakenly identified Jared Knabenbauer as Jared the Completionist. His fellow Grump, Arin Hanson, then corrected him, saying that it was ProJared and Jirard the Completionist. It then evolved into a combination of the two, creating ProJirard the Finishist.

Anyways, after having both Jared and Jirard guest star on their GrumpCade series individually, the two came together on one serial and the world got to experience ProJirard for the first time ever, playing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time. And just as their morphed name suggests, they indeed finished the game, doing so on hard mode.

King ProJirard the Finishist


This could’ve gone a number of ways. Nintendo could be up here for what originally looked to be them dropping localization of Devil’s Third, a game they had helped creating after the THQ bankruptcy. However, with nothing confirmed, and what looks to be an NDA in effect — plus Nintendo of America assuring people via Twitter that the game would be releasing in the West — Nintendo will be given a stay of Konging.

The same will be said for Square Enix. Last week, I took them to task for comments made in an interview regarding the fate of Dragon Quest games getting localized if Dragon Quest Heroes sells well. While some argue that Yuji Horii didn’t necessarily say the 3DS ports of Dragon Quest VII and Dragon Quest VIII were for sure being worked on as we speak (in French), my point still stands. It is insane to determine viability of a game using sales of a game with completely different mechanics on a completely different system from a completely different company that more than likely has a completely different fanbase. But even as stupid as that is, they were not the worst.


This week’s Kong goes to Polygon. And while there are a number of reasons for Konging them, there are two that will be specifically listed. The first is a bit minor though noteworthy: the interview piece where Square Enix said that future Dragon Quest localizations would be dependent on sales for Dragon Quest Heroes. It wasn’t the publishing of the piece, but missing any information about Horii’s slip-up from the day before.

Ultimately, however, that is just a minor thing and could easily be looked over. Instead, there was something far worse that gets them Konged this week. Below is an image of a Tweet made by Polygon for the passing of Nintendo CEO Satoru Iwata. Notice something a bit… off?


For the record, Polygon has gone back and fixed the image for the Tweet, but that’s besides the point. When you run a story like this, you need to make damn sure that every part of it, from the tone of the article to the images put on social media, are done right the first time. This isn’t some generic piece you can just rush through and edit later; this is someone’s life. And while you may have negative opinions of them, they still deserve your respect and a little extra time to make sure you do them justice.

For that, Polygon is this week’s Kong.

UPDATE: There seems to be an argument going on around the web as to whether this is a legit tweet or if it was photoshop. If it was legit, it’s possible that it was taken from a different article that just happened to have an image on the same page. It happens, just look at our Facebook when we publish an article but it features an image from something on YouTube. So, perhaps I shouldn’t have gone after Polygon as hard as I did. Still, a little precaution in something like this to ensure the right image goes out goes a long way.

Also, new rule: anytime we Kong another site, it can only be for humor, no matter how stupid it was. Otherwise, we end up with something like this.

Stay tuned for next week where I Kong myself for doing this.

Agree with the choices? Have your own opinions on who should be King and Kong? Let us know in the comments below.

Jeff Neuenschwander
Jeff has been a supporter of the website and campaign since the beginning. Joining in for E3 2012, he worked his way up the ranks quickly, making it to the Editing Manager post at the beginning of 2013. Jeff has a wide variety of tastes when it comes to gaming and pretty much likes anything that is quirky, although his favorite genres are Action, Platforming, and RPG. Outside of gaming, Jeff is a musician, being trained as a trombonist for Jazz and Classical music, and holds a degree in Sound Recording.