24) Water Park
Oh, this could’ve been so much better. When I hear “Water Park”, I think of slides, flumes, and wave machines. Excitement, fun, and avoiding someone’s pee in the swimming pool. That’s not what we got with Mario Kart 8’s vision of such a park. Sure, it looks kinda nice, and the last section of the track is cool – BUT THIS IS NOT A WATER PARK!
23) Rainbow Road
Eesh! One track that everyone looks forward to with every edition of Mario Kart is Rainbow Road. Every single version has had a Rainbow Road, and they’ve all been memorable in their own right. I just don’t see it happening with this one. Firstly, there’s too much grey and not enough colour. Secondly, it’s not overly challenging. A pretty weak effort by Rainbow Road standards. Although, it does have ample chances of spin boosting, and that’s always fun.
22) DK Jungle
Another track that sadly falls into the ‘forgettable’ category. Whilst the upgrade in visuals looks gorgeous on the Wii U, and the fact it’s cool to be driving around a non-Mario universe, there just isn’t enough added to really make me care. Sorry, Donkey Kong.
21) Sweet Sweet Canyon
There’s no denying that Sweet Sweet Canyon looks splendid. You could almost say that it looks… good enough to eat… *tumbleweed*. Anyway, it’s not a bad course and it does start off quite well. Launching out of a cannon, then spiraling down around a scrumptious looking cake is quite entertaining. Then it goes a little bit haywire. The anti-gravity section throws you off your bearings. Then in the final few bends, you have to contend with hungry piranha plants ruining your mad drifting skills.
20) Piranha Plant Slide
Piranha Plant Slide certainly has a cool aesthetic to it. Channeling the art style of the original Super Mario Bros. game is pretty awesome, and it has a unique layout. The idea of entering a pipe to the ‘Underground’ levels of the classic games is a nice touch. It’s just shame the underwater sections take away some of the fun.
19) Wario Stadium
Wario has had a fair few tracks to call his own throughout the Mario Kart series. Sadly, this isn’t one of his best. It’s not bad, but when I think about the N64 Wario Stadium, or the aforementioned Coliseum from Double Dash!!, I find this one to be a little lacking. Having said that, the added-on anti-gravity section is devilishly tricky, which makes it very satisfying when you navigate it flawlessly.
18) Yoshi Valley
Yoshi Valley was one of my favourite tracks from Mario Kart 64. So when I heard it was getting the remake treatment, I was positively giddy with joy. Even though it retains pretty much everything from the original — and of course looks gorgeous — I can’t help but feel that something is missing or that they could’ve added a bit more to it. I know it now has a blast cannon, but that takes you through the longest route which makes it a bit rubbish if you ask me. What’s that? You didn’t ask me? Oh…
17) Bowser’s Castle
Like Rainbow Road, Bowser’s Castle is another track that has appeared in all iterations of Mario Kart. This has some pretty cool moments, especially when you encounter the giant lava Bowser trying to squish you with his monstrous paws. Despite that, I feel there are too many hazards to contend with, which can really ruin the flow of the race. Besides, nothing will ever top the N64’s Bowser’s Castle. NOTHING!
